The leader of the vegetarian society just couldn’t control himself anymore. He just needed to try some pork, just to see what it tasted like. So one summer day he told his members he was going on a vacation. He packed out of town, and headed to the nearest restaurant. After sitting down, he ordered […]
Everyone loved Priest John. He was a happy jolly fellow always willing to help or lend a hand. One time John was walking down the street humming a tune when he saw a little boy trying to reach the doorbell of a nearby house. “Hey there sonny” said John “let me help you out”, and […]
Sandy and Norman were in despair. Their 3 year old son Timmy still had not learned how to talk. Not a word had escaped through those now 3 year old lips. One night at dinner, Timmy took a taste of his pie, and to their utter surprise and amazement, said: “You call this pie? It […]
A cop was hiding in his usual spot when he saw a car speed by at 90 mph. Quickly turning on his sirens, the cop pulled over an old lady. “License and registration please” said the cop in a tough voice. “I’m sorry,” responded the lady, “I forgot to ask him where he keeps his […]
Joe was a steward for Fly High airlines. He watched as an older lady boarded the plane holding a dog in a cage. “Excuse me,” said Joe “dogs are not allowed on board, you have to check it in with the baggage.” The lady wasn’t happy, but Joe was an experienced steward and succeeded in […]
A man died and went up to Heaven. Upon arriving he noticed two signs: one said “Men Who Are Bossed By Their wives,” the other one said “Men Not Bossed By Their Wives.” After closer inspection he noticed that while next to the first sign was a big line, by the second sign there was […]
An old man went to the Doctor complaining that his wife could barely hear. The Doctor suggested a test to find out the extent of the problem. “Stand far behind her and ask her a question, and then slowly move up and see how far away you are when she first responds.” The old man […]
Jerry was at a marriage seminar, and the leader of the seminar, a lady, was asking everybody how long they were married for. When it was Jerry’s turn, Jerry said that he was married for almost 50 years. “Wow” the leader gushed “that’s amazing, perhaps you can take a few minutes to share some insights […]
Harry and Barbara’s marriage has been on the rocks for a while, so when they hear about a marriage seminar being given in their neighborhood, they decide to attend. “One of the most important things in marriage”, said the speaker, “is to get to really know your spouse well. For example,” continued the speaker, “How […]
Like most women, Sandy loves going shopping, much to her husbands chagrin. “Here, take a look at this”, says her husband Tom, shoving the credit card statement in front of her. You spent $250 at Macy’s, $150 at Nordstrom, $122 at Lord and Taylor, and another $225 at JC Penny. How in the world do […]
Barry and Hannah, an old married couple, are sitting on the couch watching TV. On the show they were speaking about how to prepare in case of death etc. “Honey,” says Barry, turning to his wife with a serious expression, “I want you to promise me that, if there ever comes a time that I […]
Two men met at a bus stop and struck up a conversation. One of them kept complaining of family problems. Finally, the other man said: “You think you have family problems? Listen to my situation: A few years ago I met a young widow with a grown-up daughter. We got married and I got myself […]
