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A drunk walks up to a barkeeper one day and says, “If I show you a trick will you give me a free drink?” The Barkeep says “Depends on how good of a trick it is.” The Drunk reaches into his pocket and pulls out a frog and places him behind the piano. The frog […]
A man walks in a bar and the bartender asks, “What’ll you have?” The man answers, “A scotch on the rocks, please.” The bartender hands him the drink, and says, “That’ll be five dollars.” “What are you talking about? I don’t owe you anything for this,” the man replies. A lawyer, sitting nearby and […]
A pirate walked into a bar and sat down for a drink. The bartender asked, “Gee you look awful, are you feeling okay?” “I feel fine, why do you ask?,” said the pirate. “Well your leg is half missing, you have a wooden peg leg!” “Arrr that happened a few years back, cannonball came right […]
“Look at ME!!” boasted the fit old man, pounding a very flat and firm stomach, having just finished 100 situps before a group of young people. “Fit as a fiddle! And you want to know why? I don’t smoke, I don’t drink, I don’t stay up late, and I don’t chase after loose women!!” He […]
Frank was getting ready to go on a trip to New York for the first time, and was talking to his friend Bill. Bill: “While you are in New York, there is a bar that you have to go to. When you walk through the front door, you are handed a free drink. Then […]
One day a blonde felt like being a rebel, so she decided that she would drink and drive. She found a cop car in the parking lot of a donut shop, so she started to drive around, circling the cop car. After about 10 minutes of driving round and round she got fed up, so […]
Sam heard all about the great service in the “Sleep Fine Hotel”, so after dropping his stuff in his room, he excitedly headed down to the hotel lounge. He was only there for a few minutes when a beautifully dressed waitress came over to him. “Would you like something to drink?” she asked. Sam took […]
A cop pulled over a car and finds a young couple in the front seat. “Where’s your seat belt young man?” asked the cop. “Oh, I just took if off now when you were walking up to the car”, responded the man. “No you didn’t!” exclaimed his wife, “you never wear your seat belt!”. A […]
